Saturday, January 16, 2010

Taking pee & peacocks in stride

I am fulfilling so many resolutions right now you'd be shocked.

I am taking Mikko to the zoo, because he wants to see the peacock, and the peacock he shall see. If we play our cards right, which we usually don't, we will have more than an hour to enjoy the majestic bird before the zoo closes.

Sam said to me the other day that he noticed I hadn't exploded in anger recently. It was the day I'd woken up soaked in pee from our purportedly potty-trained, cosleeping two-year-old. (I'm currently writing a review of a potty seat, and I think anytime you talk about how your toddler is potty independent, there is some balancing of the cosmos and you get peed on.) Sam went on to say, Like getting peed on this morning — you didn't even swear.

Now, to be honest, I think I was just too sleepy to think up any good ones. And maybe I've just been lucky lately on the emotional front. And there was a certain part of me that thought Sam was patronizing me, laying it on thick so that I would "keep up the good work!" — not unlike Mr. March and Marmee (which Swistle reminded me of). But I looked more closely, and Sam was being sincere, so I decided to take it as a compliment and not an excuse to, you know, get angry to prove I hadn't changed.

We started talking about how, when we're taking full-time care of our son, we can actually be more patient, more understanding, more even-keeled — for the most part, you understand! — because, well — why? Maybe because we're exposed to Mikko more and therefore understand him better. Maybe we adjust our expectations to reasonable levels. Maybe we just bond and feel connected and feel more like partners, parent and child, than antagonists, parent vs. child.

Now that I've said that, of course, the same gods who caused Mikko's bladder to erupt prematurely will cause me to let loose a tornado of swears at the zoo. I've got to watch for that.

And the peacock. Beautiful bird. Lovely plumage.

Off we go!


Unknown said...

Glad to hear your resolutions are going well! I have to watch my temper too. Hope mikko got to see the peacock!

Anonymous said...

I think maybe simply losing time with your child makes you stress about that, which shortens the amount of patience you have.

More stress = less patience.

Just a theory. From a mom that is working outside the home full time. Sigh.

I hope you got lots of time to ogle the peacock!

Bibliomama said...

Angus loved the peacock at the Valleyview Little Animal Farm ('Daddy, he spwead out his tail and it was so pwetty -- and it had stickers all over it!'). I sort of love the image of your husband saying 'way to go being less irascible, hon!' and you saying 'piss off, dickwad' and hurling a coffee cup at his head, but only in an unreal, sit-com sort of way. Your actual improvement is much more impressive, in the real world. Where we have to live. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

My daughter alternately adores and is terrified of peacocks. I can't really blame her - their shriek is sort of fearsome.

I'm glad that things are going well for you, and I'm sure you haven't jinxed it. In parenting, as in all things, there are up times and there are down times. The trick is to just go with the flow as best we can, you know?

Lauren Wayne said...

All right, here's my report. It was a loooong day, and I am still frozen to the bone. Did Mikko wear his mittens or hat? No. And often not his jacket. And then he said his hands hurt. Hmmm...yes.

We saw the peacock, and Mikko took off over the most deceptively muddy field, pushing the stroller (would he ride IN the stroller? Um, no) all the way. Peacock-spotting success.

A squirrel came up to sniff his shoe and half-climb his leg, which makes me wonder if perhaps people ever might possibly feed the squirrels at the zoo. Mikko said, "All done, Eichhörnchen!" which is German for squirrel, I hope, because that's what I called it. And then he wiped his shoes off because the squirrel had made them "dirty." He's very fastidious. Except when it's a field of mud.

Those were 2 of the 3 animals we saw. We mostly sat on an old tractor and played some drums. At one point we fake-milked a fake cow.

Throughout the day, I was feeling kind of grumpy (hungry, back hurt, cold, bored, had to pee — sometimes all at once) and had many opportunities to snap and be a jerk, and I almost always reined myself in. I didn't ever yell or cuss, so yea. I did tell him to shut up once, so boo. But we made it. I knew I'd be checking in, so I'd better fly right.

bibliomama: You have made me feel almost recovered by making me laugh so hard at your imagined script. Absolutely what was in my head.

Jorje: I think you're right, because in general if I'm thinking about what I have to do instead of being with my kid, then I get antsier. Sorry you have to be away from your little one so often!

Thank you all for the good wishes toward spotting peacocks and keeping my temper! It must have worked.

Dionna @ Code Name: Mama said...

Good for you, mama!! I have felt much more calm this week too. I don't know if Kieran calmed down somewhat, or if the weather changing has helped, or what.
The zoo sounds really fun!
~Dionna at Code Name: Mama

Darcel said...

When we went to the zoo last summer, there was a peacock roaming the zoo. The girls wanted to follow the bird all over the place.

I'm glad your so happy with yourself lately. I've been having a rough few days, but I'm making it. Lots of deep breaths over here :)

Gotta love pregnancy hormones.

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